Shameless Thievery.

I totally ripped this off the Remix's blog, but like I said before--bored and lonely. Apparently this sort of thing is called meme (pronounced meem), which sound more like something that grown under your toenails than a survey, but whatever, right?

One book that changed your life: It was early, and I didn't even read it, but when I was 5 my Aunt Nancy recited The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe to me while my uncles and Pops were out trying to plant grass in our clay backyard in the middle of a drought. If there'd been any doubt about my literary bent, this one sealed the deal. I wanted to make stories, stories like that one, stories that could make you laugh or cry or gasp out loud. Never did quite get it down, but I'm getting there.

One book I've read more than once: One? I read everything more than once. A Catcher in the Rye (can you imagine a less original choice?) is an old favorite. My copy has a cover that won't stay attached, stains every few pages from reading at dinner until Pops would make me put it down, and entire sections held together by scotch tape and memory.

One book I want to take on a desert island: I'm not going to cheat, like some people, and pick a dozen, so I'll bite the bullet and settle on one. It. Hear me out, now. I know it's not literary, and I know Stephen King is the proud epitome of everything wrong with the American lit scene, but I have my reasons. One, it's a hefty read, 1100 some pages, an excellent time killer and possible escape raft. Two, it's FUN. It may not be Hemingway, but you won't be bored. It's King at his very best, creepy and disturbed, trying too hard to make horror-movie fiction read like legitimate art. I love it, in spite of myself.

One book that makes me laugh: A Confederacy of Dunces. Flat out, no question, the funniest fucking book I've ever read. Legitimately good, too, Pulitzer Prize and all that. The only thing not funny about it is the fact that John Kennedy Toole killed himself before it was ever published. (Though, honestly? That sort of makes me chuckle too.) Anything by David Sedaris is a close second, here.

One book I wish I'd written: High Fidelity. It's far from being a "great" book, but it's my voice, my kind of writing, and a much clearer idea than I've ever had. Oh well.

One book I wish had never been written: Mary Shelley's Frankenstein. I've never been more annoyed with anything I had to read in a class than Frankenstein. It's not just that it's a dumb story, I've read lots of bad stories. It's not just that it's the first highly acclaimed novel by a woman, I respect that and understand the importance. It's the fact that the book is so bad. The monster learns English in a month, and then carves notes for Dr. Frankenstein INTO PIECES OF ROCK, mind you, that are both eloquent and lengthy. Is the doctor such a poor pursuer that he's unable to catch his creation during the 8 WEEKS it must take him to write these little masterpieces? Give me a fucking break...

One book that made me cry: For starters, Where the Red Fern Grows. I was eight, I wanted a dog, and this book broke my fucking heart. More recently, Schindler's List, for obvious reasons, and The Da Vinci Code, because it's almost as bad as Frankenstein, and I'm really sick of hearing about it.

Book I'm currently reading: All the Harry Potter books, I just picked them all up in paperback to reread. Good, quick, and fun to read. I just finished The Truth by Al Franken, another reread, and I've got Thank You For Smoking sitting here on the desk next to me waiting to be picked up.

One book I've been meaning to read: The World According to Garp. Never quite got to that one, don't know why. Also, I'm told I need to read some Kate Atkinson, and soon, so the Remix has someone to talk to about it. Fight Club has been on my list for a while. I need a library card, stat!

That's all for now, I'm going to go knock back three more excedrin and pray for death. Thanks for reading!